cochlear implants, Other Things From The Heart, Parents of special needs kids, Things I've Learned, Uncategorized

I Don’t Have a Girly- Girl and That’s OK

“What grade is your son in?” a mom at the gym asks. “My daughter is in 4th,” I casually replied. <insert uncomfortable apology>  I assure the poor woman there’s no need to worry.

It doesn’t bother my daughter. She’s used to it.

When this kid was a toddler, funny enough, she lived in princess costumes, and pink tutus were busting out of every drawer. Even though kicking a ball and swinging from monkey bars were always favorite pastimes, back then~frilly accessories were plentiful, and pants were obsolete. (Flashback to hog-tying Said toddler to put on pants when temps dropped below 40 degrees)!

img_3957
Fast forward~as she prepares to turn 11…

She still likes to over accessorize to the nth-degree… but now in the form of mismatched Star Wars or Harry Potter socks, sports tights and trucker hats, often looking like a cross between a circus performer and skate rat.

It’s not gender plural, or gender fluidity, or gender neutral. She’s herself~ and for now prefers green and navy, basketball and Ninja Warrior, and the clothes in the boy’s section at Old Navy.


She likes board shorts. Skull caps. Skateboards.

And, who cares.

She’s also compassionate. Intelligent. Empathetic. And kind.

I believe a kid (boy or girl) can be all those things. And still, wear pants or bows. Do ballet or shoot hoops…

Or be a combination of all those things and more.

Being authentic is key. And learning that at a young age is golden.

For this kid, it’s not about being a girl. Or boy. It’s viewing life without limits and not falling for stereotypes.

She isn’t a girl wanting to be a boy. She is a girl who wants to be herself.

Happy Birthday Bean

38967_1482109605687_6200966_n

1 thought on “I Don’t Have a Girly- Girl and That’s OK”

  1. Your daughter reminds me so much of myself when I was younger (19 now). I used to wear boy clothing from the ages of 8 to 16 – as you wrote – it had nothing to do with gender or sexuality – it was just me. When I was her age I really did not care about fitting in. However once the teenage years take over it becomes radically more difficult to just be yourself; wearing boy clothing, coupled with the fact that I had bilateral cochlear implants – I basically had a neon billboard on my head saying “I’m different”. This led to years of bullying and a low to non-existent self-image – but through it all I still remained me. Just tell your daughter to be fearless in the pursuit of being exactly who she wants to be. Dare to be different.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s